Roller Coaster

I've been expecting to go on this extended trip for work for a while now. We were expecting to leave next week. It's something that's important to me professionally, as it gives me opportunities to learn things I just can't do while I'm at home. I've been looking forward to it, both because it's to a really cool place, and because, frankly, I've felt a bit left out. Others have been to this place, but I haven't had the good fortune to be both at home and available when the trips came up. This time was for me.

Then last week something happened. Upper levels of management (and boy, is THAT an understatement) decided that we should go somewhere else. Oh, and by the way, the job you do? We don't need it so much over there, so you and your trainer (and a couple of other folks) will be taken off of the list, and replaced by a few others.

Sigh. OK, these things happen. But then they changed their mind, and said I WOULD go. Sadly, that lasted only a day or so, as they quickly changed back and decided that my trainer and I would best be served by staying home. But just in case we DON'T go to the other place, plan to go to the first place. It got as far as signing out of the office in preparation to leave, before they finally said no, we're definitely not going to the first place, and you're and those other 4 guys are staying home so we can take these 3 guys.

Yesterday I was out doing some other training. When I came home I checked my work email, and found that while I was out, they changed the list again. Everyone who was originally supposed to go on the trip to the first place is now back on the list, and the extra people are off. The list is back to where it was at the very beginning, but the trip is going to the second place. Oh, there's one exception. *I* am not on the list. My trainer is. And since I was out of the office all day, I don't know why not.

Now I need to go to work today and find out what's going on, and figure out how personally I need to take this. I sincerely hope that I don't have to take it personally at all, but I can't help feeling a little ... betrayed. Maybe that's not the best word, but it's the one that comes to mind first. We'll just have to wait and see.